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Sunday, January 3, 2016

Is there anything more jinxy than publicly announcing your resolutions?

This morning I woke up early with goals on my mind. Being in school takes the fun out of goal setting, because school is just one GIANT goal that consumes a great deal of my...everything.

There are lots of things I want to be more of~

Tolerant
Loving
Flexible
Patient
Informed
Relaxed
Generous
Spontaneous

However, thanks to my brain being unable to shut off, I thought ALL NIGHT long about what would be most beneficial to the me, and to my relationships with the people I care about (and probably even to the people I don't care about).

I came up with 3 things.

1. Focus. My mind is ALWAYS going a million directions at once. I read and "listen" at the same time. I talk on the phone while having conversations with my kids (could there be a WORSE thing for a mother to do? Call me dramatic, but I think not). My mind wanders when I'm talking to, well, lots of people. It's a terrible terrible terrible habit. Goal number one is to have ONE conversation at a time and always make eye contact if it's an in-person conversation. 

2. Balance. I get super cranky when I don't get my "space". It's selfish I know, but fortunately, I don't require massive amounts of personal time. So when I say balance I don't mean the scale will be set at 50/50, probably more like 97/3, but I think that making sure I get 30 personal minutes daily is, A. Not asking too much, and B. For me, plenty. Goal number 2 is to spend half hour of each day doing something that I want to do, like exercising, reading a non-school related book, or watching dumb TV.

3. Laugh. Listen, I gotta tell you, at this point I feel like my "goals" seem stupid, but I know myself, and I know that these three things are holding me back, so STOP JUDGING ME! Sheesh, When I laugh my whole disposition changes. I imagine most people feel the same, but I also imagine, and maybe I'm way off here, but I imagine most people have an easier time finding things to laugh about than I do. I love funny things, but, especially lately, my head is down and I'm hurrying from work to school to chores to bed and back again, taking time to laugh does not find its way onto my very full to-do list. Therefore, goal number 3 is to find the humor in my life. Honestly, this might be the hardest thing on my list.

Putting everything out here on the blog should help with accountability. I know that all three of my readers will be on pins and needles waiting for progress reports. I'm also going to straight away (I've been watching a lot of British TV over the break) set monthly dates in my calendars to evaluate my progress, AND I'm going to tell my phone to remind me. Hopefully I will annoy myself so much I will be impossible to ignore.

I feel like I never do anything the easy way. These are not very specific or measurable goals, and maybe I will forever be a terminally serious and grouchy person who is unable have meaningful relationships because I am not able to give my undivided attention to any one thing at a time or laugh at silly stuff. But I hope not, because that would be sad.

1 comment:

lori.huffaker said...

Let's go to dinner soon, I need a good laugh too. We can talk about the stupid things that happen in class, and the fact that I have Valerie Legrande in one of my classes and we had to post a selfie to our discussion board post. Her's is AWESOME!! Plus she was all braggy about her awesomeness. See, I need you too! Laughing seems like a good start.
Your goals are awesome. And measurable. If you would like, when we are together and you text or answer a call, I can punch you in the neck. That is measurable. Let me know. I'm happy to help! Also, spend a half hour a day watching one episode of Kimmy Schmidt. Please. That will help with laughing.

 
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