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Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Hey there!

I was going to write something this morning but then I got distracted by this great story on Kottke about David Sedaris having a garbage truck named after him.  So, go read that instead. It's awesome.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Sometimes even I can't believe the stuff I do...

At work there are vending machines. Obviously. Nowadays you don't have to have cash for vending machines, you can use your card. Did you know that? Well, you can. 

The other day, at work, I decided I would get myself a snack but I didn't have any cash. Which fortunately did not matter. Or at least I didn't think it would matter.

I need to pause here to tell you that I have anxiety 80% of the time I'm at work because I worry that someone is going to try to engage me in conversation. It's not that I don't like people, but I'm awkward, and casual conversations with my co-workers seems to really magnify my awkwardness. 

So...It's mid-afternoon, which in my mind should have been a low traffic time at the vending machines, and I take my card and go to get a snack. I swipe it, nothing happens. I'm not a vending machine pro, I've used them before, but only with cash, I don't know what is supposed to happen when I use my card, but nothing does, so I wait. Then 3 chatty girls come in and sort of form a line behind me, because they want snacks too, I guess. INSTANTLY my palms get sweaty and my heart speeds up. 

I'm a dork who cannot use a vending machine and now there are witnesses. 

I take a deep breath, enter my selection again and STILL nothing happens. So I did what anyone of you would have done, I asked the girls waiting behind me how the machine works. 

WRONG!!!!

That is NOT what I did. What I did was PANIC. I backed away from the vending machine empty handed, and said "you guys go ahead" and walked quickly out of the break-room. But not so quickly that I missed the puzzled looks on their faces as to why I would swipe my card, enter my selection, and leave with nothing

I am a giant weirdo who now has to sit at her desk with her head down hoping none of those girls ever cross my path again, which really sucks because in my haste to get away from them I forgot to memorize what they looked like. 

There. Now you can enjoy your weekend being relieved that,even if you're a little quirky, at least you're not me. 

 
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