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Monday, September 29, 2014

"Studying"

I have 2 exams this week so I took the day off from work to study. I am currently 100 feet into the procrastination portion of my study plan. I have checked facebook and instagram, eaten 3 rice crispy treats, and done a load of laundry. The next logical step seemed to be to get started on the flashcards write a blog post.

I've been missing my kids lately.

Especially this one~

 

He's just over a month into a nine month deployment to the Mediterranean Sea. It already feels like he's been gone forever.

But its not just the kid that's out in the middle of the ocean who I miss. I miss all of my kids. As they grow up we spend less and less time together and I know less and less about their day to day lives and it makes me sad. A little. I mean I know this is how it's supposed to be, Circle of life and all that crap. But you know what? There are days I love to go back 10 years and just freeze things.

Time flies and it's just not fair. 

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Just a couple quick items...

 1. While I can imagine it's a horrible thing to have naked pictures of yourself leaked onto the internet, I have to ask....WHY are there so many naked pictures of these women available for leakage? I can't say there are NO naked pictures of me anywhere, but I can say if there ARE, they were taken when I was less than a year old. Pictures of my grown-up self without any clothes on DO NOT exist. Just sayin'.

2. If you have not read this or listened to this you really should.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Whoa!! 2 days in a row!?

I KNOW!! I can't believe I'm here again either, but yesterday went quite a bit better, and lo, though I'm not a superstitious person, I figured it couldn't hurt to wear the same socks I wore yesterday and get up early to write a short blog post.

Last night our daughter had a band concert.....can we talk about those things for minute? WHY SO LONG BAND TEACHER?? I love my kid, we ALL love our kids, but seriously, 2 hours, on a week night where each arrangement is introduced as being written by "one of the most proflific composers of our time, or all time, or his time" come on now son!! It's toooooooo much.

K?

Anyway!! I got there early and these two women came and sat a couple of rows behind me. I was trying to study the elasticity of demand but they were talking and talking and it was enough to distract me from the fascinating algebraic formulas in my text book. If you know my love of a good equation you know that is no easy feat. Good golly they had A LOT to complain about. Or at least they thought they did.

Perspective makes all the difference, don't you agree? Most of us have so  much less to be unhappy about than we admit. Complaining seems to be something we do, like it's our version of my grandpa's version of, "I can top that one, did you hear about the...?" (Not that my grandpa every played I Can One Up You, he's not that kind of guy, but you know what I mean, right?)

Ok. Gotta run. Today's gonna be even better than yesterday, I'm sure of it.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Hey there!!

I miss blogging. Is that weird?

Not blogging exactly, but spilling my guts on a semi-regular basis is therapeutic.  The less I write, the more things jangle around in my head, and I start to feel like I need some serious in-person therapy to get things straight.

I'm still in school, which I love, and I'm still working, I love the part about that where I get money. So there's that.

I've been thinking the past couple of weeks about living in the moment and enjoying each stage of my life. Are there people who are good at that? (Please say no.) I want to be able to, at the very least, be present, instead of always rushing through this thing so I can get to that thing. I'm like a mouse in a maze and all I can think about is getting to the cheese at the end. Lately though, I feel like I run into the walls A LOT.

I should be doing homework right now. I should ALWAYS be doing homework. I keep waking up in the middle of the night wondering how I got to be such a crank. I'm so worried about what needs to be done, running from thing to thing, that I'm "in a state" 90% of the time. Bless my heart. A couple of times last week I laughed loud and hard about something and it caught me off guard. I'm pretty sure I used to be more fun.

Anyway...

My late night conversations with myself have convinced me that there must be a way for me to do all of the things I'm doing, but be balanced, and fun for crying out loud. If you can't be fun what's the point?? If I had to describe myself I would say optimistic and happy, curious, loving, sarcastically funny, and nervous in a way that is debilitating at times. These days though the nervous beating out all of the other stuff and the sarcasm has turned bitter and I don't like it. Not one little bit.

Here's to spilling my guts and getting back on track.

 
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