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Monday, June 3, 2013

I have delicate sensibilities.

I'm like that girl from the story with the princess and the pea. You know, the princess. I need my sleeping conditions to be just so.

Several years ago my husband and I found "sheets of a higher thread count" and became sleep snobs. I'm really not one of those people who's all about luxury. Most of the time I think stuff like that is silly, but soft sheets......ahhhh.  The first time we bought really nice sheets I was in awe of the fact that there were was something out there with the smoothness of satin without the shiny bachelor pad side effects. (It takes so very little to impress me.) Since then we've been loyal 300 count or above club members, but sheets, especially for king sized beds are expensive. I'm not that picky about matchiness, I just need them to be soft, so I try to find them on sale.

A few weeks ago there was a set on clearance at Target and I bought them, even though I couldn't find the thread count anywhere on the package. I figured they were from the Nate Burkus line, and a friend of Oprah's must also be a friend of soft sheets. Right? Sadly y'all, it is not so. I put them on for the first time yesterday and last night when I slid into my bed I felt like I was sliding into sandpaper. A super fine grit, mind you, but sandpaper nonetheless.

I hate to take them back, I don't have the package and they've been washed already, but I know I'm not going to use them, unless there's some kind of sheet emergency, which I really don't foresee. Besides I'd feel like a dope. Or Lovey Howell. "I'm so sorry, but these sheets are not nearly smooth enough for my nocturnal needs. Please return them to the manufacturer with my regards." 

I guess I'm stuck with them, but I want you all to know, I'm not happy about it.

What's that thing people say........first world problems? Yeh. That's me.

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