Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Our seats were good too.

I have a thing about getting to the movies early enough to get a good seat. It doesn't matter what the movie is, I hate sitting in the front or the very back or too far to either side. If more than 60% of the seats have been sold, I won't even buy a ticket. Why would I pay good money to be miserable for 2 hours? Exactly.

Don't act like it surprises you that I'm a freak.

Experience has taught me that if a movie has been out for more than a week, thirty minutes early is probably fine. However, if you're seeing something opening weekend, especially if it's an action movie, you should try to arrive at least an hour early. Trust me.

Saturday we went to see Skyfall. Our original plan was to go between 5:00 and 6:00 because it's less expensive, and more importantly, less crowded, unfortunately we didn't make it out of the house until 5:30, my husband thought that still gave us plenty of time to make it to a 6:10 show, but my gut was telling me that getting there so close to showtime on opening weekend could only end in a seating disaster. Thankfully there are times when he knows not to mess with my crazy and he agreed to the 7:00 showing and we headed out.

This fascinating, right? Hang ON, I'm getting to the good part.

The plan was for me to get in line while my husband and son got some dinner. I bought the tickets and was relieved to see that there were only about 40 people ahead of me.....at 5:50....for the 7:00 show. So, there, I'm not the only weirdy. There are 40 others. We're a small elite group of movie goers. Back off.

I brought a book to read while I waited. A book is a multi-purpose prop; 1.catch up on some reading 2. avoid awkward conversations with goofy people who like to be early to movies (you wouldn't believe some of the conversations I've gotten roped into). It was working fine until an older couple got in line right behind me. First I overheard them talking about a down jacket that was on sale at Eddie Bauer, which could be important...... if you don't live in the desert, wearing a down jacket around here could do a person in, so I was waiting to hear if they were visiting from a part of the world where down can be worn safely, they never said where home base was, instead they skipped straight from outerwear to some bitter chit chat about the mother-in-law, I tried not to listen, but you know how it is with in-law ranting, I'd like to see any of you tune that out, when they started going over their seating plan I gave up on reading. These people had a strategy, they were not messing around.

Him~ "Ok, as soon as they let us in we'll try for the two right........and if those have already been taken we'll go for .........."
Her~ "Yes, we should split up right away, that way each of us can try to get a different set. If we can't get the two right........, then we should at least be able to get the ones that are.........."

They did not speak aloud specifically which seats they were gunning for, it was clear they didn't have to. Make no mistake, they may have been dressed like a couple of unassuming senior citizens out for a movie, easily confused or bumped to the side, but this was not their first rodeo. I wouldn't have been surprised if one of them had a seating chart, or even a stun gun, in their over sized bag of outside contraband treats.

After they had confirmed the plan they went back to talking about stuff like Roger Moore on Entertainment tonight and I was able to get back to my book. When I'm reading sometimes I kind of get in a "zone" and don't pay any attention to what's going on around me, so it's possible the seat schemers had tired to get my attention before I noticed the wife squatting next to me trying to get a look at the underside of my book..

When she caught my eye she looked a little embarrassed, I guess she was thinking no one would see her there, practically upside down.

"I was just wondering what you were reading." She said. I showed her the book (Team of Rivals), she asked if it was good, I said that it was, she said that it must be if I could read it with all of these people around. Then we both smiled awkwardly and I went back to reading. Not too much later she touched my arm and asked if I'd read the new book by "that woman who wrote Harry Potter". I told her I had not, she told me not to bother, that she was a foracious (which I guess is a mix of ferocious and voracious) reader and it couldn't hold her attention, she'd rather read Harry Potter. "Now those are some good books, she should stick to writing that kind of thing." Then she asked if my book was about Lincoln. It was. Then she asked if I knew there was a new movie coming out. I did. Then she asked if I had seen Entertainment Tonight because Roger Moore was on and his face has just gotten really big, like it's swollen. He doesn't look like himself at all, in fact, as first, she thought he was Jack Nicholson. (which if you ask me is not too shabby, but maybe it's not a compliment, I don't watch Entertainment Tonight, and I haven't seen my old pal Jack Nicholson in ages, so who knows?) Anyway, she continued, everyone says that Daniel Craig is the best Bond ever. And that guy who plays Lincoln? (Um, Daniel Day Lewis, I said silently to no one, because I didn't really want to risk further discussion and also, good luck getting a word in anyway.) She read somewhere that he spent a year studying Lincoln before they ever starting filming so it's probably going to be pretty good. She just might have to go see it.

The whole time I was just standing there smiling and nodding holding my open 20 pound book. Finally she said she'd let me get back to my reading. Which I tried to do, but that's when she and her husband decided to go over their seat grabbing plan again, and as much as I was dying to know how Lincoln convinced Seward to take the Secretary of State job it was too tempting to listen in.....

Her~"So I'm going to rush up there........ while you try to get, you know......those are really my first choice but if we have to take the others that will ok too."

Eventually my husband and son showed up and it was finally time for our movie. After we were settled in our seats, but before I could tell my husband this story he leaned over and said "Did you see that lady who was behind us in line? She charged ahead like she was in a big hurry. Trying to get the best seat I guess."

You have no idea.

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