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Friday, September 30, 2011

It's like torture with a scoop of ridiculous on top

So, I started running.

I know, you’re impressed. Me too.

It’s been a little over a month and I can now run an entire 5K distance on the treadmill without dying or making sounds that make other people think I’m dying. (Yeah, yeah, the treadmill, my loving son keeps reminding me it is NOT the same as REALLY running. My children are so tender. I wonder where they get that. Anyway, who cares? I think we can all agree that “fake” running is better than the alternative, which, in my case, is watching people run on YouTube.)

However, this is not a post about my amazing athletic abilities (though I will agree with you, my abilities are pretty impressive), this is a post about television. Specifically ESPN. And also race cars.

The other day I was at the gym (on the treadmill) and the TV was tuned to ESPN2, let it be known, ESPN2 has daytime programming like no other (which is not necessarily a compliment). I’m not familiar with the channel changing protocol at the Y, though to be honest I was a mile into my run by the time I realized what I was watching and there’s no way I’m going to get off the treadmill, change the station, and return to my run, so I ended up watching the delight that is NASCAR coverage for 40 minutes. FORTY! Who had any idea there was so much to say? It just looked like a lot of crashing into walls and tire changing to me. At one point a little bubble popped up on the screen that said Lap 271. Are they kidding? People sit at home drinking Budweiser watching these cars go around in ovals for 271+ laps?! I don’t get it.

What I really want to know is why no one is watching I Love Lucy reruns while they work out. Seriously, I could probably run through 3 or 4 episodes of Lucy and Ethel’s shenanigans and be distracted enough that I forget how much fun I’m not having. Instead I’m watching sweaty race car drivers and I can’t decide which is more agonizing, NASCAR or mile 3.

Here's my point (you didn't think I had one did you?) ~ Even if I thought driving fast cars was a sport, and I don't, watching people who are more physically fit than I am while I'm trying to get physically fit is not my idea of a good time.


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