Monday, May 16, 2011

The following events are in no particular order.

I thought last week would never end. There’s so much going on around here, I would love to tell you all about it, but I’ve been watching a lot of old X-Files and I’ve decided “Trust No One” is a pretty good rule to live by.

Here’s what I can tell you~

My husband and I chaperoned at the 6th grade dance. Wow! 6th graders have really changed in the 65 or so years since I was 12. The music was loud, the girls were mature (looking), I was frightened and I think the boys were too. 6th grade dances aren’t really a positive experience for anyone.

Our oldest son told us he’s planning to get married. An idea I wasn’t really planning to explore for a few more years. Over the weekend we went out to dinner with our son, his girlfriend, and his future IN-LAWS!!!! They’re very nice people.

My mother lost her job. Well, it’s not really lost, she knows where it is, it’s just not hers anymore. As with all things involving my mother the story doesn’t end there, but my attorney has advised me not to say anything more in this type of public forum or in any room that might be rigged with “listening devices”.

Yesterday I was supposed to write a letter to my son who is going on a 3 day pretend pioneer trek in a couple of weeks. I haven’t written the letter yet because forced sentiment is so hard for me, it’s almost harder than real sentiment. I’m thinking of either writing a sad letter telling him that after he took off with the Mormons I had no one to look after the cow so it died and now there’s no milk for the baby. I hope he’s happy. Or I’m just going to print out one of those pictures of a cat playing the piano and put it in the envelope. I believe that would be just as inspirational as any letter I could write.

On Thursday I realized the birthday present I bought 3 weeks ago for one my favorite people is still sitting in my office. It needs to be in Switzerland in 6 days. It’s still here. I don’t think it’s going to make it.

On Saturday I went to Home Depot and spent a million dollars on plants for our front yard that will not survive a month due to a combination of the scorching fireball above my house and lack of nurture from the nutball inside my house (that’s me). On the way home I saw one of those “The end is upon us!!” May 21st billboards and I realized that I didn’t even need to bother having those 6 panic attacks I had last week, because thanks to my wicked nature, if all goes as planned, the earth will open wide and swallow me up in just a few short days. I know it’s true because Oprah is ending her show and why would she do that if she didn’t have some kind of inside knowledge about the end of the world? Exactly!


Karen said...

This is hysterical ... which means you're handling things like a champ. Of course you are!

I need to hear the story of how you have a favorite person in Switzerland. Please and thank you.

Cheryle said...

Life is what happens while we're busy making plans! You will survive the challenges - both great and small - and look back on them someday and wonder why it seemed so hard!

I am sorry about your mom's job. I went through a lawsuit when I lost my last job, and it's no fun. I also wasn't able to find another (who says there's no age discrimination, hmmm?).

As for your son's impending marriage, that's the one that makes YOU feel old! Hang in there, kiddo!

Heidi said...

Your new(ish?)profile pic is adorable! You certainly don't look old enough to have a son with soon to be inlaws.

Zoe de gaia said...

Ce site est très informatif.J'adore ton site, il est super!Merci.Continuez!
Je suis Robson Rocha, je suis styliste au Brésil. Je suis fou de mode et je fais de cela une manière d'expression.
J'accompagne toujours votre blog et j'aime beaucoup votre travail. Moi aussi, j'ai un blog où je montre mes créations de mode. je voudrais vous préseter mon blog www.zoedegaia.blogspot.com
J'espère que vous apprécierez la visite
Je vous remercie de votre attention.
Robson Rocha.

AuBien said...

Love your new picture!!

Anna said...

This was my first time on your blog, I found you via MMB post of the week and have enjoyed myself. I think I'll be back again soon. :) By the way, I hadn't heard/read anyone else put the end of the world and Oprah ending her show together before- funny.

Em @ Inspired Coincidences said...

You're writing is hilarious. I'm sorry our mother lost her job, but I'm so glad she knows where it is still =) I also feel for those 6th grade boys....girls are scary!
visiting from MMB =)

Em @ Inspired Coincidences said...

*ps, my comment is supposed to say "I'm sorry YOUR mother" not our....cause that would just be weird if we had the same mom but didn't know each other. Ok, I guess not too weird, weirder things have happened!

NatureGirl said...

I am pretty sure I am going to die laughing...WITH you I hope! And what exactly is this "big fiery ball" you speak of?!
Reader from the north country...

Carrie said...

Awesome post! Isn't blogging just the best place in the world to vent it all out and not worry if anyone is judging you (I am not by the way-your week sounds like it went extremely smooth compared to mine...) because it is your blog anyway so you can say what you want??? I could kiss whoever invented blogging! I can't wait to read more of your posts because I LOVED this one!!!

Julie said...

So glad you linked up at MMB this weekend so I could read this this morning. Loved it. I needed the smiles.

Radel said...

Love it!! I will be back to read more from you. Found you on MMB! have a great day!

carrie said...

Wow Sue! I too was counting on either the rapture or you to take care of you-know-who's birthday gift and neither one showed! Oh well, there's always next year (unless of course the world ends in October). Good one with the Oprah connection. Keep digging, you'll find a connection.