Thursday, April 28, 2011

I like to ask myself....What would the queen do?

When Charles and Diana had their big wedding thingamajiggy my mom and I woke up super early in the morning and watched the whole thing, live, in our pajamas.  Of course that was in the days before VCRs. 
You know, the stone age.
These days I'm not all that interested in the Royal Family or their shenanigans, however, I did consider waking  our daughter early and making some sweet little memories of our own, but then I remembered, this is the future, age of DVRs and youtube, and I'm convinced watching a recording of some strangers in a strange land getting hitched will be just as fun as watching it live (you know....not very). 

*Edit* As she was heading to bed my daughter asked me what time I was going to wake her up so we could watch the wedding, "just like you did when you were a little girl mommy". Boys and men all through the house were heard whispering "SUCKA!" when I replied "3 a.m honey." It was worth it. That Queen Elizabeth is such a crack up.

For Darcy

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I have no title. So there.

It must say all kinds of things about my mental state that I think that snail is so stinking funny, huh? I can’t help it. When he/she/it says “We won’t fight unless provoked.” I die. Every Time!

Sometimes people say I’m goofy, then I say, compared to WHAT?

Enough about that, can we talk about how there are millions of books and magazines and blogs for people with small kids and babies but there are none (that I know of) for people whose kids are growing up waaayyy too quickly and holy crap graduating from high school and dating girls that they might be serious about (“I dunno.We’re not not serious.”) And SCREEECH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can we just slow down for a sec? Or 3 years or whatever.

It seems like just yesterday my biggest worry was that one of my kids would get something stuck up their nose (actually that might have happened yesterday, 16 year olds can be so trying), and suddenly we almost have 2 out of high school, 3 almost driving, and 1 telling me not to worry, he’s not even going to consider marrying anyone until they’ve been dating for at least 4 months. BACK UP BUDDY!! Try 4 YEARS!!!!!!!!! (Sorry about all the exclamation marks, I’m feeling slightly freaked out by this stage of my life.)

It’s too soon. There are too many things I haven’t told them about life and too many that I’ve told them but they haven’t paid attention to, because, duh, I’m old and know NOTHING about life.

How does one gracefully accept that her little chicks might hop out of the nest soon? Especially if she’s scared to death they might just break their little necks if they do because, believe me when I say, these guys are NOT ready to fly.(I know because I TOTALLY was when I stepped out into the big world.)

Monday, April 18, 2011

My one regret in life is that I'll never have a dog.

Over the weekend I went to Trader Joe's and got some of these....
And some of these......
Frozen croissants.
 I put them on a cookie sheet over night.....
in the morning they looked like this....
then they turned into this.....
Oh. My. GOSH!!

Also, there's this--

I can't stop laughing. Thanks Karen!!

"Sometimes people say that my head is too big for my body, then I say, compared to what?"

A few minutes ago I walked into the office where my son was doing homework. On the computer screen was a Google search......How can you catch syphilis?

So I said, "Hey buddy, whatcha doin?"

"Writing a report for biology." And he's not even kidding.

These are the days of my life.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Miss me?

Last week was a little crazy. It ended with a cold rain and a 3 day migraine, AWESOME, but today is looking good, so I’m going to forgive last week with its icky self. Today my head is nearly back to normal (whatever that is for me, normalish?) and the weather is gorgeous. I’m having to fight the urge to throw open the windows and spring clean, it looks like I’m going to have to settle for working at my desk and enjoying the view.

Saturday we ran errands all day, in the rain. I went crazy and bought a vacuum cleaner. I’m such an impulse shopper. Then at the grocery store my husband embarrassed me by talking about sex in front of someone he didn’t know I knew (FROM CHURCH) who pretended not to know me, bless her heart. I’m blaming it on the weather and those trashy magazines at the check out stand. After that we went home and watched a really stupid movie, Abandoned. I recommend you avoid it at all costs. I really want to write a letter to Hollywood and let them know if they're just looking to throw money away I have a garbage bag they can use.

And finally, basketball……It must seem like I’m one of those people who drops out of March Madness after her team loses, huh? Sooo not true. Though, I have to admit, it’s not easy to keep up that level of excitement into April, which begs the yearly question, why call it “March Madness” if it leaks into April? Anyway. Eli (iliketurtles57) won the tournament challenge with his mascot bracket, and has asked for a Texas Longhorns shirt. Where have I gone wrong?

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Almost Done

The party is over for most of us. Great games last night. There were moments when I thought Kentucky might be able to pull it off, but no such luck.

Here's where we stand going into the championship game tomorrow.
1. iliketurtles57
2. natertater57
3. toddthomas123 2
4. sth0mas09 1
5. Aubien11 1
6. SueLunt1
7. edgertonlunt 1
8. JT-UKND 1
9. Carpenter1
10. BigDaddyL57
11. lori huffaker 1
12. doublebubbleface22 1
13. dark_temptation1
14. TheEnchantedUnicorns

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Live Blogging KY vs. UCONN pt 2

Second half
Knight hitting a 3 is a good way to start. Two in a row is even better.

Unrelated but still very important, if you make your Rice Krispie Treats with extra marshmallow, then you put yours on a piece of paper towel, it's probably going to stick.

Four 3s in the first 5 minutes. And, may I say....Josh Harrellson=AWESOME!!

This is killing me. Back and forth with the lead. I should have taken a Xanax.

It's just a game. It's just a game. It's just a game.

Down by 4 seems like 20 with less than 3 minutes left.

Jones at the line. Misses. Crap.

Down by 3 under a minute left. Breathing into a paper bag.

Cause I'm CRAZY!!!

Kentucky ball, we now begin the longest minute of the evening. Liggins at the line. One in.

Kentucky ball, 16 seconds left. Time out. Arrgghhh!!

Really, I don't understand the timeout with 2 seconds left. Must we prolong the inevitable?

It was fun while it lasted. Great season Kentucky!!

Go Butler!!

Live Blogging KY vs. UCONN

Are you ready for all your wildest dreams to come true? I thought it would be fun to blog my technical analysis of this evening's game between Kentucky and UConn.

Lucky you!!

Tip off is in about 20 minutes, both teams are warming up right now and here's my first thought. Those white warm up suits are not all that attractive or intimidating. I think I might shoot a little note to whoever is dressing those guys. All white does not say "You better watch it buddy!" it says "Please don't get too close with that chocolate ice cream cone." Not the message we should be trying to send.

Jimmer just won the Senior Class award. Good for him. He seems like a nice young man.

Now feeling sorry for Shaka Smart (headcoach VCU), I hate it when those stupid reporters ask how the coach or the players feel right after their team loses a big game. Duh, they feel like crap. If they MUST interview them it seems like they'd ask a question that we don't already know the answer to.

I LOVE it when Chuck (that's what his friends call Charles Barkley) talks about the teams. He cracks me up. I am soo agreeing with him about the One and Done thing. For crying out loud- it irritates me when these freshmen are drafted after their first year.

K. Just a few minutes til tipoff. Take a couple deep breaths. Innn.....ouuuuut.....Innnn......

Here we go. My palms are a little sweaty. Is that weird?

FINALLY hitting a 3! After how many tries? Ugh. All that missing is not going to work for me.

First timeout, Ky up by 2.

Sidenote-Last week at the grocery store our daughter saw a beer display and reenacted a Budweiser commercial word for word. Little too much March Madness maybe?

I'm getting a little tired of the shot missing here. 25 percent success is probably not going to cut it. (When I say probably, I mean not at all.)

These retirement commercials are not helping my anxiety. As if, at this moment when my team is losing and not playing so hot, I want to be reminded that I need to get jiggy and plan for my future.

10 points behind. Seriously?! Gah!

Also, running down the clock....RUDE.


I'm not gonna lie, things aren't looking good. Lets see if Chuck thinks they're going to be able to pull it together in the second half.

Kimba Walker, Kimba Walker....blah blah blah. Whatever.

Hmm. Chuck is not making me feel any better. I might have to go back to calling him Charles.