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Friday, April 16, 2010

Double True

~Because my insanity knows no limits I have decided to actually make a meal every single day for the two weeks and see if my family notices. If you have any suggestions for tasty one/crock pot meals (who am I kidding? Tasty- in one pot?) that do not require stewed tomatoes, mushrooms, onions, anything green, or smell funny my children would love to eat them. So suggest away. Please.

~I have decided that I must have a pair of track pants to be an effective soccer coach (not that I am implying in ANY way that I am NOT an effective soccer coach, cause I am. Really. Why are you laughing?) And I’m really going to need those pants by 4:30 this afternoon. Never mind the fact that I have not had a pair of track pants for the last 3 months and I have been a perfectly……..um.....present coach without them. The decision has been made and now I must find some pants. What?

~I love my daughter, but some days I am overcome by a casserole of emotions (maybe I should make one of those for dinner) when I drop her off at school. Relief, cause, you know…..the conversation about me being the meanest mom in the whole wide world is on hold for 6 hours. Gratitude for the public school system (you didn't see that coming, did ya?). Remorse over the fact that her teacher is not fairly compensated for having to continue where I leave off everyday. Proud that she is so strong willed and confident. Comfort because, um, seriously, no one is gonna mess with that girl, not if they know what’s good for them. And tired, just really, really tired. Too tired for 7:36 a.m.

~I need to call my mother today, and by need I mean she has successfully surrounded herself with people who are more crazy pants than she is and my curiosity is killing me. I really want to call her, but I haven’t told her about my brain thing yet (I’m waiting. What if there’s nothing to tell? Trust me. My mom is a master at making mountains from molehills, and she doesn't need a lot to work with. If she’s going blow things out of proportion, I’d like to know at least she had the facts to begin with. Left to her imagination I could be having a triple lobotomy in no time.) If I call her and don’t mention it I'll probably be in trouble later. I have to decide if my desire to hear about the nuts in her life is greater than my fear of the guilt she will try to make me feel when she finds out I didn’t tell her I almost died in church. ( I didn’t really almost die in church, I’m being theatric. Is it working?)

~Have any of you read The Piano Teacher? I’m just a few chapters in and I’m on the fence. Is this going to irritate me like Loving Frank did? If so, tell me now and put me out of my misery. I am not having much tolerance for the selfish cheating character these days. It’s probably a phase.

~Did you know that yesterday was National High Five Day? Wow.  A day for high fivers. That’s fine if you're a high-five kind of guy, but I know some people lean more towards the Stop Drop and Roll. When do they get a day?


8 comments:

Becky said...

Gosh, I don't even know where to start - there's so much!

You have a brain thing? Where have I been? (Not keeping up, apparently.) I hope your, uh, brain thing resolves itself.

Sorry 'bout your crazy-ish mom. I have one of those. Except it's my dad.

I love crockpot meals! Except normally what's in the pot is not the whole meal. I use it for beef stroganoff or spaghetti sauce or chili or ham. Oooh, or beans! Good stuff.

And, of course, good luck finding the perfect pair of pants. Hive five!

Becky said...

Hive five? Sheesh, I'm a moron.

You know what I meant, right?

The Crash Test Dummy said...

ooh, so much to say, but I have to come back later, gator because my son's ear is hurting.

verifier: daburfa.

hahahahha

The Crash Test Dummy said...

k, I'm back. You're verifier says mutet. Is that like a teenage mutet ninja turtle, or a silent eighties haircut?

I was going to praise you on making a meal every single night until you added that peppers, tomato sauce part. How can you cook a meal without peppers or tomato sauce?

I probably didn't remember those ingredients right, did I?

The Crash Test Dummy said...

oooh, I was way off. But how can you make a meal without stewed tomatoes or mushroom or onions. Those are my favorite foods, plus peppers.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

okay, I can't believe there is a national high five day. Is there also a national shaka day? If not, that's discrimination.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Okay, but for reals, that's super scary about your brain thing. I'm worried about you. I would send you flowers, but it looks like someone has beaten me to the punch. Two someones.

You will appreciate this: my brother's son has been in the hospital for a total of two weeks, but had previously been to see several doctors over a period of 6 weeks. He said he now understands why they say they are "practicing" medicine. Hopefully with enough practice they will eventually get it right. They still don't know what's wrong with him.

HOPe YouRe OkaY!

LY

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Hey, your verifier says restsyne

It's a syne that you need to get some rest.

You're welcome!

 
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