Friday, March 27, 2009

Fashion, she is not my friend

I tried, but it’s really not all that much fun writing about other stuff. One person even seemed a kind of annoyed, I gave it a go, it didn't work out, so back to what I do best-me.

I'm not exactly what you would call a fashionista, I'm closer to a fashion-isn't-a. If you happen to have a sec, and you don't mind, I would really appreciate it if you could kindly spare a little girly advice. There is a catch though, I’m not willing to spend a lot of time on perfecting my look, so don't waste your breath telling me some secret recipe for eye cream that has to be cooked on the stove top for hours and then chilled to just the right temperature, for one thing I don’t have “a look” and B. I just don’t care that much about my lack of a look. I care just enough, and one thing I know for sure is that I am nearing the age where things stop holding themselves up and that is an ugly reality that a woman can only ignore for so long until people start to turn away when she enters a room. Before everything falls down and it’s too late, here’s what I need to know--

How on earth do you shave your knees? For the love of my daisy razor, I just can't do it. I try, but it never fails that I have a few stray hairs poking off my kneecaps. Sometimes they get a little long, and you can bet that’s embarrassing, or it would be, if anyone ever saw my pasty white knees. After 28 years of leg shaving you’d think I’d have a few tricks, but I don’t. So tell me, how do you do it? Is there some secret technique that I’m missing because I didn’t read the Girl Manual?

Next up- eyeliner. I don’t wear much make up, generally just mascara, but lately I've been feeling like I need something extra. More and more often I look as old as I feel. Other women seem to know just how to apply eyeliner so it doesn’t look like they are dancers in a Britney Spears music video. I, on the other hand, cannot figure it out. No matter what kind I use, within an hour it’s all smudged and looking like I just took a nap.

What kind of bra do you wear? Is that too personal? I don’t like underwire or anything lacy. Usually I end up wearing a sports bra or something along those lines and go around with everything looking all smooshed together. I would really like to be lifted and separated without feeling like if I twist the wrong way things are going to come flying out all over the place.

Lastly, I know that Crocs are on everyone’s bad list, but what about these? They’re not so terrible, are they? I think they're kind of cute, and I betcha they're light as a feather. (Be gentle, I might have ordered some already, you never know with me.)


Alexis said...

Knees? We're supposed to shave our knees? This women thing just becomes more and more of a pain in my butt all the time. I have always just gone with the 'do the best job I can without looking like something attacked me' look.

Eyeliner. Sorry. I. Have. No. Idea.

I wear a Victoria Secret Full Coverage Demi bra and I love em but they have an underwire (that I just can't live without) and they are a tad pricey. During pregnancy however I wear disgusting wireless bras from motherhood that cost too much as well but are no where near as nice.

Shoes. Now that is more my thing. I like the shoes, they look cute and comfortable, I might just have to ask where you found them. And I am never a trendsetter and always behind on the times but what's so bad with crocs, I just bought 4 pairs?

thedomesticfringe said...

I NEED underwire. The girls are too big. If you don't need, you're lucky. Victoria's Secret or Soma Intimates have some great bras. They are online too. Expensive, but well worth good support and coverage

Eyeliner - buy an angle brush, dip in a tad of water and then in a deep eyeshadow. Use that as eyeliner. You get a sharp,thin line that stays in place.

Ok, that's all I've got. Good luck!

Sticky (not too) said...

I am giving no advice...I have my own horrific lack of fashion sense. No need to pass it on!

Used to wear cute little bras...not after childbirth. Now it's underwire all the way -ouch.

I have no crocs - i'm back and forth about them, but those look cute...


Cheryle said...

Knees are only supposed to be shaved as well as you can do it. Only fashion models and people who wax can do it well. If you wait long enough (say, your mid-50s) your body hair (yes, ALL of your body hair) will begin to diminish rapidly and you'll only have to shave once a month or so anyway.

Eyeliner? Unless you're young enough that your eyes are poochy, it's best to either forget it or use a pencil that you smudge intentionally! It gives a nice, soft line and a sultry look. Mostly.

Underwire bras are something I never wore - till I had kids. Now I can't do without them. Watch your local newspaper for ads from the high-priced stores and go for a free fitting. They have them a couple of times a year. Then you'll know what looks best and feels best and save up to buy two of them. (Another of the nice things about getting older is that you don't perspire much at all, and can usually wear one while the other one "airs out" to be worn the next day.) If you don't wear a good bra, the girls will eventually look real cute next to your unshaved knees. Just sayin'.

I like crocs. And I like the shoes you may have alread bought. So buy 'em if you haven't yet!

I've just used up my fashion advice quotient.

Cheryle said...

PS: I should have said "unless your eyes AREN'T poochy.

Jillian, Inc said...

Hi- Visiting from Big Mama. I have no idea about the knee shaving, as I have the same issue. Eyeliner: I know this sounds expensive and a bit conceited, but it isn't. Go get permanet eyeliner done. It's great. Perfect application, doesn't smudge and it's acutally not permanent, so you won't still have eyeliner when you're 80. It fades after about 3 years. Seriously...I am not crazy - ha! Otherwise, Clinique and Lancome both have great waterproof eyeliner that works great when you get the hang of applying it. I buy great $10 bras (with underwire) from Target...with no extra padding. And finally, not a big fan of Crocs, but I do love similar style in Sketchers brand. They sell them at Kohl's and are often on sale.

wesley's mom (sue) said...

Alexis-Isn't a "full coverage demi bra" an oxymoron? I thought demi meant half. The shoes are on the crocs website, in the outlet section. (Don't get red unless you want to be twins on vacation)

Fringegirl-that eyelining tip sounds like a lot of work, but I might have to give it a try anyway. Thanks!

Sticky-yes, I too remember the cute little bra days. They are long gone for me as well.

Cheryle-I don't care enough about having hairless knees to wax, but I think I'm probably going to end up doing the professional bra fitting thing. I hate admitting I can't figure everything out for myself, but this has me stumped.

Jillian-I know some people swear by the permanent eyeliner, but it's not my bag. The idea of someone using their little tattoo needle next to my eyeballs ..... nah.

Heidi Ashworth said...

I just always wear dresses and cropped pants long enough to cover my knees and only go swimming under cover of darkness. This has solved my knee-shaving problem.

Anonymous said...

Found you from Big Mama.

Okay, knees - no idea because I have the same problem:)

Eyeliner - I've tried 'em all and I like Maybelline Unstoppable but Revlon Colorstay is also pretty tenacious. Pick a color that's not too dark to start(taupe, soft brown, etc). Also, just line the outside 1/3 of the top lid and outside 1/4 of the bottom until you are used to seeing yourself with eyeliner. You can then line the whole upper lid but never the whole bottom or you will close the eye in, making it look smaller. Kind of defeats the purpose most people use liner:) One more thing, never line inside the lashes, on the inner ridge of your lower lid. It looks stupid and smears off.

Bras - I like Kohls for bras. They also have great sales. I recently found a style by Maidenform that I like a lot. It comes in underwire as well as soft cups. I personally like the underwire because I need the lift/support. I am small busted but after children lost my "perkiness":( You might want to check out the bras that are now made of what feels like foam, although I think it's nylon. Some of them are contoured like an underwire, without the actual underwire if you don't like the feel of them.

Shoes - love the Crocs for casual wear. You could always get some cute flats for when you want to look more polished.

Hope that helps!


Heather Kay said...

Stopping by from Big Mama.
For knees, I use Veet or Nair. I like to put my feet on the dash when we're driving and my knee hair was always grossing me out...the Veet works!
I like the liquid eyeliner at Kohl's, and I just tried the $10 bra's at Target and I like them a lot!

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...


I bought these in black for an outdoor wedding.

You will want baby powder or something or your feet will make fart sounds. No lie.

*dies of embarrassment*

Anonymous said...

Knees: thick shaving cream will show you where you have shaved. If that doesn't work, give up caring! Anyone that close to your knees to comment on the hair is just too darn picky.

Bare Escentuals has an incredible eyeliner brush that makes putting it on much easier and foolproof. I wet a brown eyeshadow, work it into the brush and put it on.

Victoria's Secret can measure you for the proper size bra.

The shoes you've ordered are adorable!!

To me it sounds like you care just the right amount!

AuBien said...

Gals....the comments are just what I needed after a long day with little ones. Cracking me up here!

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Boy you got a lot of advice. Especially from Big Mama's. Who's big mama?

You probably don't need more advice and I'm sure you're looking beeeUtiful by now.

But liquid liner is what I've finally settled on. It never smudges. Don't try to draw the whole line on at once. little lines upon lines makes a straight line.

And NO more sports bras for you. You need shape, girlfriend. Especially if you're wearing crocs. ;)

But what would I know. I wear slippahs.