Saturday, December 6, 2014

A post where I unsuccessfully use a lot of ... and / in an effort to save time.

This is going to have to be quick because I have a million (and one) things to do today, but I'm trying super hard to perfect my procrastination skills, so...tada!!

I love/hate the holiday season. Buying crap no one needs and living up to all of the unreasonable exceptions I have for myself, blech! And Christmas parties...who needs em?? The holidays are the WORST for those of us who don't like to see/talk to/touch other people. On the other hand, the lights, the music, Bing Crosby and Danny F-ing Kaye?? Can one ever get too much of those things? I think not! And peppermint flavored EVERYTHING! DUDES!!? Heck ya!

School is almost done for the semester, which makes me happy and sad (my inability to pick one emotion to feel is just as annoying for me as it is for you...and my husband, so just know that, okay).
I'm happy because the stress of work/life/school gets to be a bit much, but sad because as dorky and nerdy as it sounds, I really LOVE school and learning. I am a dorky nerd. Recently I was sending a text message and I typed fork, but my phone changed it to dork. Which was what I actually intended to type. My phone knows me too well. Which is a spooky topic for a different day.

Ok. For reals y'all, I have to go. Have a holly jolly weekend!!

p.s. it took me 45 minutes to write these 2 and half paragraphs, this does not bode well for the 6 page paper I have been putting off all week.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

Hey there!

I was going to write something this morning but then I got distracted by this great story on Kottke about David Sedaris having a garbage truck named after him.  So, go read that instead. It's awesome.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Sometimes even I can't believe the stuff I do...

At work there are vending machines. Obviously. Nowadays you don't have to have cash for vending machines, you can use your card. Did you know that? Well, you can. 

The other day, at work, I decided I would get myself a snack but I didn't have any cash. Which fortunately did not matter. Or at least I didn't think it would matter.

I need to pause here to tell you that I have anxiety 80% of the time I'm at work because I worry that someone is going to try to engage me in conversation. It's not that I don't like people, but I'm awkward, and casual conversations with my co-workers seems to really magnify my awkwardness. 

So...It's mid-afternoon, which in my mind should have been a low traffic time at the vending machines, and I take my card and go to get a snack. I swipe it, nothing happens. I'm not a vending machine pro, I've used them before, but only with cash, I don't know what is supposed to happen when I use my card, but nothing does, so I wait. Then 3 chatty girls come in and sort of form a line behind me, because they want snacks too, I guess. INSTANTLY my palms get sweaty and my heart speeds up. 

I'm a dork who cannot use a vending machine and now there are witnesses. 

I take a deep breath, enter my selection again and STILL nothing happens. So I did what anyone of you would have done, I asked the girls waiting behind me how the machine works. 


That is NOT what I did. What I did was PANIC. I backed away from the vending machine empty handed, and said "you guys go ahead" and walked quickly out of the break-room. But not so quickly that I missed the puzzled looks on their faces as to why I would swipe my card, enter my selection, and leave with nothing

I am a giant weirdo who now has to sit at her desk with her head down hoping none of those girls ever cross my path again, which really sucks because in my haste to get away from them I forgot to memorize what they looked like. 

There. Now you can enjoy your weekend being relieved that,even if you're a little quirky, at least you're not me. 

Monday, September 29, 2014


I have 2 exams this week so I took the day off from work to study. I am currently 100 feet into the procrastination portion of my study plan. I have checked facebook and instagram, eaten 3 rice crispy treats, and done a load of laundry. The next logical step seemed to be to get started on the flashcards write a blog post.

I've been missing my kids lately.

Especially this one~


He's just over a month into a nine month deployment to the Mediterranean Sea. It already feels like he's been gone forever.

But its not just the kid that's out in the middle of the ocean who I miss. I miss all of my kids. As they grow up we spend less and less time together and I know less and less about their day to day lives and it makes me sad. A little. I mean I know this is how it's supposed to be, Circle of life and all that crap. But you know what? There are days I love to go back 10 years and just freeze things.

Time flies and it's just not fair. 

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Just a couple quick items...

 1. While I can imagine it's a horrible thing to have naked pictures of yourself leaked onto the internet, I have to ask....WHY are there so many naked pictures of these women available for leakage? I can't say there are NO naked pictures of me anywhere, but I can say if there ARE, they were taken when I was less than a year old. Pictures of my grown-up self without any clothes on DO NOT exist. Just sayin'.

2. If you have not read this or listened to this you really should.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Whoa!! 2 days in a row!?

I KNOW!! I can't believe I'm here again either, but yesterday went quite a bit better, and lo, though I'm not a superstitious person, I figured it couldn't hurt to wear the same socks I wore yesterday and get up early to write a short blog post.

Last night our daughter had a band concert.....can we talk about those things for minute? WHY SO LONG BAND TEACHER?? I love my kid, we ALL love our kids, but seriously, 2 hours, on a week night where each arrangement is introduced as being written by "one of the most proflific composers of our time, or all time, or his time" come on now son!! It's toooooooo much.


Anyway!! I got there early and these two women came and sat a couple of rows behind me. I was trying to study the elasticity of demand but they were talking and talking and it was enough to distract me from the fascinating algebraic formulas in my text book. If you know my love of a good equation you know that is no easy feat. Good golly they had A LOT to complain about. Or at least they thought they did.

Perspective makes all the difference, don't you agree? Most of us have so  much less to be unhappy about than we admit. Complaining seems to be something we do, like it's our version of my grandpa's version of, "I can top that one, did you hear about the...?" (Not that my grandpa every played I Can One Up You, he's not that kind of guy, but you know what I mean, right?)

Ok. Gotta run. Today's gonna be even better than yesterday, I'm sure of it.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Hey there!!

I miss blogging. Is that weird?

Not blogging exactly, but spilling my guts on a semi-regular basis is therapeutic.  The less I write, the more things jangle around in my head, and I start to feel like I need some serious in-person therapy to get things straight.

I'm still in school, which I love, and I'm still working, I love the part about that where I get money. So there's that.

I've been thinking the past couple of weeks about living in the moment and enjoying each stage of my life. Are there people who are good at that? (Please say no.) I want to be able to, at the very least, be present, instead of always rushing through this thing so I can get to that thing. I'm like a mouse in a maze and all I can think about is getting to the cheese at the end. Lately though, I feel like I run into the walls A LOT.

I should be doing homework right now. I should ALWAYS be doing homework. I keep waking up in the middle of the night wondering how I got to be such a crank. I'm so worried about what needs to be done, running from thing to thing, that I'm "in a state" 90% of the time. Bless my heart. A couple of times last week I laughed loud and hard about something and it caught me off guard. I'm pretty sure I used to be more fun.


My late night conversations with myself have convinced me that there must be a way for me to do all of the things I'm doing, but be balanced, and fun for crying out loud. If you can't be fun what's the point?? If I had to describe myself I would say optimistic and happy, curious, loving, sarcastically funny, and nervous in a way that is debilitating at times. These days though the nervous beating out all of the other stuff and the sarcasm has turned bitter and I don't like it. Not one little bit.

Here's to spilling my guts and getting back on track.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

I have to know...

What's the deal here? I saw this "Bottle Maker" at Target a few weeks ago. Is this really a thing that people are buying? 

Back in the day, when our kids were babies, admittedly it's been 13 years since I made a bottle so I suppose things could have changed dramatically, but in the olden days we just scooped the formula into the bottle, added water, and shook it up. It was pretty straight forward, and also nearly 100% incident free. 

BUT NOW...The Formula Pro does ALL OF THAT EXHAUSTING AND OH SO TRICKY work for you...

For some reason I feel inclined to blame Paris Hilton for this.